Mar
10
WHERE DO I EVEN START?! HELP WITH BOYFRIEND?
By
Pamela O 2 asked:
ok… to total up - I found a couple of txts on my bf's phone the alternative week from a lady organising for them to encounter up… she seemed to be flirting, but his sent box was dull so couldnt see what he'd pronounced to her. Anyway he pronounced which she was an old crony and they'd only been assembly up for coffee - but it never went forward in the end, and he hadnt referred to it to me in box I got sceptical or peculiar (which I can do!).And there was additionally one there observant "fancy picking me up? lol" which had been sent the night prior to - right divided I do know he didnt reply to which as new texts were in his outbox, he pronounced this was from an ex, but I find it uncanny he'd have his ex's name saved as Caroline - Sweden… but again couldnt infer differently so let it go. Anyway given afterwards Ive been wondering was it which innocent, or had he been personification divided so I and YES I know unequivocally poorly checked his email account. (had his cue from ages ago). Here I found no justification of him analogous with girls in a intrigue mannerls, but I found notifications from unequivocally dirty adult sex/dating sites - I went and looked at his form on these… where he was promotion he longed for one on one sex incidents etc etc… There hasnt been any wake up on these sites for ages, so I hold he stopped regulating them when he met me…. but right divided Im worried… what if he knows these girls from these sites….I cant contend it to him as I know I shouldnt have review his emails so what should I do? Whilst Im unequivocally tender he hasnt been regulating them, I am kinda endangered this is how he knows these girls…. help!
I did plead him intrigue on me when Id seen these texts and he denied it blatantly observant he never would. He does flattering most outlay all his gangling time with me, and regularly texts when hes out but me so I know anticipating time to encounter up with alternative girls would be hard….
its weird…. I do certitude him…. Ive never had any reason to think differently before… the only these mails have kinda repulsed me some-more than anything… palm on heart, I dont think he'd lie on me.. Im only kinda confused right divided yet - i hadnt suspicion he'd be the sort to make use of these sites..
ok… to total up - I found a couple of txts on my bf's phone the alternative week from a lady organising for them to encounter up… she seemed to be flirting, but his sent box was dull so couldnt see what he'd pronounced to her. Anyway he pronounced which she was an old crony and they'd only been assembly up for coffee - but it never went forward in the end, and he hadnt referred to it to me in box I got sceptical or peculiar (which I can do!).And there was additionally one there observant "fancy picking me up? lol" which had been sent the night prior to - right divided I do know he didnt reply to which as new texts were in his outbox, he pronounced this was from an ex, but I find it uncanny he'd have his ex's name saved as Caroline - Sweden… but again couldnt infer differently so let it go. Anyway given afterwards Ive been wondering was it which innocent, or had he been personification divided so I and YES I know unequivocally poorly checked his email account. (had his cue from ages ago). Here I found no justification of him analogous with girls in a intrigue mannerls, but I found notifications from unequivocally dirty adult sex/dating sites - I went and looked at his form on these… where he was promotion he longed for one on one sex incidents etc etc… There hasnt been any wake up on these sites for ages, so I hold he stopped regulating them when he met me…. but right divided Im worried… what if he knows these girls from these sites….I cant contend it to him as I know I shouldnt have review his emails so what should I do? Whilst Im unequivocally tender he hasnt been regulating them, I am kinda endangered this is how he knows these girls…. help!
I did plead him intrigue on me when Id seen these texts and he denied it blatantly observant he never would. He does flattering most outlay all his gangling time with me, and regularly texts when hes out but me so I know anticipating time to encounter up with alternative girls would be hard….
its weird…. I do certitude him…. Ive never had any reason to think differently before… the only these mails have kinda repulsed me some-more than anything… palm on heart, I dont think he'd lie on me.. Im only kinda confused right divided yet - i hadnt suspicion he'd be the sort to make use of these sites..
13 Comments
March 12th, 2010 at 12:51 pm
He's cheating on you.
Get away from him fast, before he gives you a disease.
March 13th, 2010 at 11:23 am
is he is acting differently?
if he is you can ask why and say that you feel like he is going off you.
good luck
March 13th, 2010 at 3:29 pm
you should tell him that your worried and talk to him about what ou think. and if you don't wanna tell him about reading the emails, then tell him your just worried about the girls texting him and you not knowing if he is talking back to them.
March 13th, 2010 at 9:06 pm
Well I hate to say it but it does sound like these girls are from this site. Personally, I wouldn't even get involved with a guy advertising for casual sex on wesbites as there would be major trust issues as to whether they were still accessing those sites. If he isn't responding then they could just be old acquaintances but I don't blame you for being so suspicious. Ask him outright honestly if he's cheating on you and keep an eye on him from now on.
March 15th, 2010 at 7:40 pm
Hope I help.."/
x Elsie x
Have a heart to heart [&&] tell him how much he means etc..
You could say a girl from work thought she saw him with another girl, and say how much it would hurt you.
Say you told her you guys tell eachother everything..no WAY would he…that he was 100% clean [&&] would never deliebertaly hurt you like that. Establish in a casual way that if he was cheating she would like to hear it from him.
Next time he meets up with a girl or whatever, ask can you have a lift with him in the car.
When they gtext him say "Oh lets ask her around for dinner, I'd like to hear all about you in school!"
Hope this helps
March 16th, 2010 at 10:11 am
i cant say his not cheating or not.
but just sit him down and ask him about it.
and say "if youve cheated, nows the time to tell me the truth"
if he says he hasnt then leave it alone.
but if he still gets messages from these girls i would leave him
March 19th, 2010 at 6:41 pm
i think every lad i have ever been with has been a member of a stupid site like that if there hasn't been any activity on there in ages then i really wouldn't worry about it he has prob even forgotten that he still has it. With the txts if the txt he got which he says is from an old friend that he is meeting just for coffee then ask if u can come along one time if he has nothing to hide then he should agree for you to come if he starts getting defensive and saying that he wants to spend time just them too then the alarm bells should be ringing. The fact that he deletes all his sent messages is abit weird as then he can tell you whatever lie he wants about the girls he is txting without you even finding out.
Sometimes going through your mans txts an emails can cause paranoia that you dont need he could genuinly just be txting old friends. You have to ask yourself if you trust this boy and if the answer is no then you should end it you will never be happy in a relationship where there is no trust go find yourself a boy who only has eyes and txts for you thats what i did and my life is so stress free i love it!!
March 20th, 2010 at 10:51 am
Ooh. Tricky.
My advice is to tell him that you're really worried, talk to him. If you think he's being faithful, tell him that… positive stuff. Maybe ask him to explain it all to you, since you're feeling insecure at the moment, and you just need a bit of reassurance from him?
If he seems defensive, give him some assurance that you'll put your trust in him, even if you don't feel that way. Maybe *he's* going through uncertain times.
He's probably unsure, too, so maybe take that into account. But whatever you do, talk to him - better to get these things out into the open before they start to fester.
March 21st, 2010 at 8:35 pm
well if it were me, i wouldnt be with him now, i would have dumped him!
March 24th, 2010 at 10:16 am
oh no!! dump him quick - any man who goes on sites like that whether they're single or not are just down right dirty!! some even get addicted to things like that - he may have another email account you dont know about and still be using these sites! be careful or just dump him.
March 25th, 2010 at 4:59 pm
its hard to say what the truth is but if i was you and for the sake of your child i would let this one go.but make it clear anything else happens like this again he is out the door
March 27th, 2010 at 12:04 pm
stop dating pam,i havent dated in just over 2 years now and i havent had to put up with any of this crap in all that time.Your dating any guy who takes your fancy and not thinking about what kind of man they really are.
March 30th, 2010 at 1:12 am
Hey Ooonagh!!!
Sounds like you might be being over the top with the paranoia, though i know i would be the same (it it were a lady!lol)
The thing that worries me is the dirty dating sites he has been on, i mean is this a person who you want to be with, in my experience men who go on these sites are just high on testosterone and want sex sex sex - nothing else. Could he be using you for sex ?
On the other hand he could be a changed man, you said that the site hadn't been activated for a while, maybe he was just going through a horny stage before he met you.
The best thing to do would be to have it out with him, tell him if he is using you for sex then to leave now, or if he really is serious about you then forget you ever mentioned it. I would just keep an eye on him though, as the last thing you want is for him to take you for a ride.
Hope it all works out luv!
x